Friday 7 December 2012

Day 17: Bloody nightmares

God, I can't take it, the nightmares the ticking, always that ticking with them, I guess since they've become such a big problem for me lately I should discuss them, at least in part.

It always starts the same, like most nightmares do, I 'become aware' in my room, it looks exactly like my room except at night. Well, it may look like it, but.... it definitely doesn't feel like it. I get up and walk to the window, I don't know why, I'm just, drawn there, like I need to see something outside. But always before I get to the window an look out I hear that ticking noise, but.... louder? This is the point I feel dread and fear, I feel like I should run as fast as I can and never look back, just keep running. But my feet drag me on wards, slowly towards the door, and the ticking get louder still. I start putting my hands over my ears to shut it out, hum loudly. I open the door, now the ticking is at it's loudest then an arm comes out, it sort of twitches occasionally, I reach for the hand and I hear the ticking come from him. That's when I wake up.

It's a weird dream, I don't know what this thing is, I guess it's not inherently scary but I can't help but wake up terrified. I woken up and I had wet my bed, I put them in the washing machine, then got some new ones, I still thought I heard the ticking noise coming from the door, I told myself it was nothing, just... my imagination. It must have been as well, since I tried the door this morning, it was locked, like it'd always been locked, but the ticking still hasn't gone away, I may tell Sarah about this she may have something to help me. Maybe I need to hang out with my mate, clear my head, get away from all of this. I'm probably just exhausted from lack of sleep and the noise in my ear, I'll probably be fine after that, yeah of course.

Right?

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